This is actually a really good article from Sachin Nakrani which makes this small blunder stick out all the more:
Hey Barcelona, Shalke 04 and Werder Bremen,
Stop being assholes. We all know it's important to get off to a good start to your season. We all know you don't want your players trotting off to the Olympics (specifically your players Leo Messi, Rafinha and Diego) if you don't have to. It's one thing to stop by FIFA's offices and say, "Hey everybody! Are you sure we have to let Messi go? He's really good and stuff and we've got a Champions League qualifier that we'd like to win. I mean, it's like the difference of 20m euros if we lose." But, when FIFA say, "Yeah. I mean, we know it sucks but, c'mon, it's the Olympics. They're pretty important. And, because we feel your pain, how bout this for a compromise. You only have to release U-23 players," you should probably let it go.
You definitely shouldn't appeal to the Court of Arbitration for Sport. And, if you do appeal and win, you definitely should take the players. You shouldn't cause everybody trouble and then just say, "Fuck it." Don't be that guy. If you're going to be an asshole and go to court to take Leo Messi, you better take Leo Messi. Don't be like Bremen and Shalke, that's all I'm saying.
Also, FIFA, you guys should stop being assholes too. You don't have the Olympics on your official calendar? They come every four years, you can set your watch by it. There's some more on 2012--see if you can sneak them on the office calendar next time.
And, in a story that has nothing to do with anything, Franck Ribery just won German Player of the Year. Like just today--it was announced today, August 6th. Didn't the season end three months ago? I mean, what the hey, am I right guys?
Hey Dan. Remember that time that you called me delusional because I thought Drogba was going to stay?
Drogba Set to Sign Chelsea Deal
Lalalala Didier Drogba Lalalalala!!!!!!!!!!
Our good friend Max just dropped this knowledge on us re: Dynamo keeper Pat Onstad:
"He hasn't been in Major League Soccer as long as you think. He did get his 500th save back on May 17th, only the 9th goalkeeper to do that. He's well on his way to 600 with a couple big ones in the last few minutes here."
First of all, I don't have any sense of how long Pat Onstad has been in MLS. My guess would be that he's been in the league for at least 65 minutes as this game is now approaching the 66th minute mark.
Second of all, that's not a stat. That's not even close to a stat. Max Bretos, you should be ashamed of yourself because you know that's not a thing. I used to think you were stupid and kind of a shit-eating grin-wearing asshole but you're not. I've heard you talk about Argentine soccer--you clearly know something about the sport. And yet, here you are, touting this stat as if it's something that every good soccer fan should know. Who can name the other 8 keepers with 500+ MLS saves? If you can't answer that, then fuck you. All I'm saying is, Max Bretos, you're the reason people hate soccer.
And then, after Onstad made a beautiful kick save on a shot from 8 yards out, Bretos informed us that he was "about to stand on his head." He's an MLS keeper that's actually making professional level saves (I was wowed)--he's been standing on his head for a LONG time.
Hang on:
Chelsea lose on penalties because an underachieving striker missed the decisive penalty in sudden death? And a long-serving defender could've sealed the win with the fifth and final penalty? In Moscow?
I feel like I've heard this joke before and I didn't like it. Mr. Shevchenko, kindly buzz off.
